I am certainly not very consistent at doing this but then I have always said I am add.  I have no ability to stay organized. Or at the very least it is with great effort that I do so.  Why am I on here tonight?  

I guess I feel  more and more that my brothers are as most men are pretty useless,  I post things about all the stuff going on in Washington and the ridiculousness of our congress and none of them ever say anything.  That is probably partly  because they don't want to encourage me but it is also partly because they just don't care.  Keith is still working and concerned about what people think of his politics.  Don has a wife that believes polites and religion should not be talked about in polite society.  Dave I unfriended but he and his wife care only about what other people think, not about the future of the country or what will happen to their grandkids in 30 or 50 years; Norma because she is not bright enough to realize she should think ahead,  David is bright enough but he would never do anything to rock the boat. 

And actually i think that is keith and don also.   I think that is most men.  I don't think it was my father but his sons did not inherit any of his desire to get involved or to care about what is going on in politics.  they come across as strong, caring people but their lives are pretty self-centered, self involved.  Oh keith has loaned me money and doesn't bug me about paying him back although god i wish i could.  But i know he hates the fact I never have and they all three hate that i am a lesbian, and i am fat and i am outspoken.  They have always stood together against me and i would take that all on me except it has been from the very beginning.  I can remember times when I knew don had said he agreed with me but when dave suddenly came up with something to laugh at me for -- don and keith both went his way.  the only times i remember anyone ever sticking up for me was at school and twice susan Emmert talked back to someone who made fun of me--once was the gym teacher, mr walls, and one time was karen jones. 

i don't remember one of my brothers ever trying to stop the other one from laughing at me--never.  And look how many years later and i can't seem to let that go.  partly because when i sent a note to keith about all the stupid things david had said, keith said he thought i was just doing my usual ranting.  He didn't address at all that dave said he was no longer a robinson or that he didin't want me around at Christmas.  He didn't care and mostly it was about it would effect him when he came home.  We would all still get together like the wonder dysfunctional family we are--saying nothing, just seeing each other for 2 hours.